If people did what they are supposed to do....

If you've heard it from me once you've heard it 20 times- and that's just in this blog... If people did what they are supposed to do I would have to get a real job- and it would probably involve manual labor.

Luckily for me, they don't-- even when you sit them down and spell it out...

Sometimes, it just boggles your mind... "Report to the jail on Friday at 6 PM and the sergeant will have calculated your time served and tell you how much more you have to do." Did he? Noooo. I was then bitching at him about making his payment to the probation office and I had told him to go out and mow lawns if that's what it took and after telling me he lived in town (What? no grass in town?) he then said, "Yeah, but didn't it rain Saturday?" I stopped wanting to help him at this point..."Dude, you don't know if it rained Saturday or not and by the way it didn't rain Saturday. Look, I have some suspicions about what your priorities are and I'm not going to say anything more about that, but you need to get your act together or you're going back to jail and there won't be anything I can do to help you."

Sometimes, it makes things easier... like today I needed to get an order changed to reflect the different payees in a case- not the lump sum as previously appeared... Defendant was served but didn't show up, so I could just tell the Judge what I wanted without having to try to explain the whole situation to the Defendant.

Sometimes, it makes things harder... Like the woman I saw today in "Who's your Daddy" court- lined up for genetic testing with five- count them FIVE possible fathers. You know, if you are one of those men you are sitting there thinking, well, only a %20 chance...

Sometimes, it makes you laugh... I was walking through the metal detector today and the girls in front of me asked the security guard where Court was.

"Which Court," The security guard asked.

"Ummm, I don't know." Replied the girl.

"What kind of case is it?"

"Ummm, I don't know."

"Did you bring the papers that told you to come to Court?"

"Ummm, no, I didn't think I needed them."

"Was it a criminal case or a child support case?"

She pauses for a minute. "Ummm, yeah, it was a criminal case I think. " She looks to her friend who agrees.

"Go to the first floor and ask the District Clerk where you are supposed to be."

Security Guard looks at me like, "What the hell?!" and I laugh.

I don't think I'll ever run out of clients.